Greetings my brothers,
I am posting from the VIP lounge (yes it's actually called that) in the Toronto international airport. A woman came up to me whilst I was seated and asked "...have I already checked you in?" to which I replied with a slow nod and a confident "Yes." She didn't check me in, this was her first time ever seeing me. I have about an hour to kill so I decided to walk around, I ended up leaving the security area so I had to go back through security which annoyed me, so I took my belt off in a dramatic fashion and threw it on the floor, I then started unbuttoning my pants but remembered that guy who got tazered to death in YVR and started to re-button my pants. I had to go through some weird new-age scanning thing and did not follow Ricardo's instructions at all. It was hilarious, it took over a minute for me to stand on 2 yellow footprints, all the while I was doing strange model poses and ballet spins.
I got seated in a row of seats all by myself on the flight from Halifax, I was chatting up the lady at the desk and asked if I could get business class, since West Jet has no business class Her words: 'with west jet we're ALL business class' Bullshit. Anyway, that was a nice perk and she promised me the best seat on my flight to Vancouver, I wonder if that includes a blowjob from the steward/ess.
I woke up this morning completely drunk and confused, it was 7:30 and I must have slept through my alarm, this resulted in no shower/breakfast/or any sort of preparation at all. Luckily I packed the night before, pre-drunkeness.
I sang karaoke again last night, it was amazing, I decided to get hammered as it was my last night in Halifax. The table of girls that I decided to sit with was pretty cool, there was one hot girl but she was flanked by fatties, apparently one of the fatties I had actually talked to and danced with on the weekend, even though I went out sober on the weekend I couldn't remember this because I met so many girls. Oh well. I sang "under the bridge" by the chili peppers, got a free drink, then I bought a double vodka tonic and sang "All out of love" by Air supply, if you don't know this song I recommend you listen to it immediately. I don't remember much but apparently I smashed it out of the park and all the girls were getting wet.
I was completely hammered at this point and realized if I wanted anything to happen with the hot girl I had to sit next to her, so I climbed over the fat friend without saying anything and started groping her indescriminately, she was down but her friends were pissed off. At one point while I was gone pissing and my friend was still there apparently the friends said "We need to get away from that guy he's hammered and groping you!" (in my words) and the one hot one said "But-but he's a good singer!"(in dave's words) Anyway, supposedly I was on the verge of being thrown out and had a 9am flight the next day so my friend decided it was time to leave and escort me out, I didn't even get to sing "Only the good die young" by Billy Joel, which was up next on my list. Great night all in all. I've realized that I don't need alcohol as a social crutch but it's a damn good time to get hammered and not give a fuck, I haven't quit drinking but I don't think I'll drink as much as I used to (almost daily, borderline alcoholic stylez)
Anyways, that was my Sunday and hopefully the next hour flies by!
p.s let's get all the brothers who are currently living in the lower mainland to get together and party some shit up, so if you guys know any good parties going on soon, let's all descend on that shit with pure pant glory.