Wednesday, September 14, 2011

One chapter ends, while another begins.

Dear Brothers,

For the past several months, whether you have been aware of it or not, has been what experts describe as the "summer time". And what a glorious time it was. The heat of the sun came beating down like the heat of the sun. The air so crisp and tasted of alcohol. The sounds of laughter echoed across the land and landed in peoples ears... Alright enough of this shit. But seriously, this summer was decent to say the least. I'll admit I spent more time working for money this summer than I did partying and having fun, but when I did I enjoyed every minute of it. I got work doing landscaping locally which was a typical nine to five/ Monday to Friday type of job allowing me to have the weekend off. Not only that but my boss was a pretty cool guy and always gave me time off if I needed it. I took up hiking on the weekends and tried to at least go out to a bar or somebody's house to live it up. Did some amazing hikes to The Chief in Squamish, Mout Strachan or more commonly known as the top of Cypress Mountain, and my favorite hike was to Garibaldi Lake in the Garibaldi Provincial Park just outside of Whistler. It's so satisfying to bust your ass to the top of a mountain and witness an incredible view with nothing but your legs, will-power and some good friends to come along for the trip. I also went on an adventure (also known as an airplane) to Ontario to visit my relatives and attend my cousin's wedding. I was only gone for nine days but it was an awesome trip. I basically got there the day before the wedding visited with family that I hadn't seen for years and just relaxed. The wedding day was great too, not sure if any of you have been to a wedding but if there is an open bar and a dance floor I am perfectly satisfied. The following day I woke up bright and early and headed over to Canada's Wonderland with my cousins. To my surprise the rides and roller coasters were not only fun but they had no effect on my hangover. By noon I had forgotten that I was wasted the night before. I spent most of the rest of the week relaxing by the lake, fishing and swimming. Before I returned home my cousin found out about a place to bungee jump just outside of Ontario in a small town called Wakefield, Quebec. Until we arrived I was unaware that it was and is the tallest bungee jumping centre in North America. The platform was a giant crane posted on top of an old quarry which dropped down 200 feet until the water which was 150 feet deep. Believe me, it is far more frightening than skydiving. There's something about freefalling really close to the ground that is a lot scarier than being really high up. After returning home I went back to work for a week and went to a few going-away parties which were lots-o-fun. Now here I am, back at school writing about how fun the past few months have been. I'm hoping this semester will be a fun one, so please everyone keep in contact and let's hang out and party when we can.

Lots-O-Love from Brother Jason.

Sunday, July 17, 2011


Deactivated facebook and discontinuing blog. If you feel the need to get ahold of me my email is

Friday, July 15, 2011

Some Recipes

I've come up with some pretty bomb recipes that are easy and delicious, I don't have them written down or anything but I'm sure I can remember. The amounts of ingredients is never the same because I'm usually making food for different numbers of people, I usually eye-ball it but for the reader's sake I'll include some quantity for a decent portion.

Mango Guacamole (wacamole canadiense)
3 ripe avocados
1 clove of garlic minced
a few pinches of salt (just keep adding and tasting, I think it's better to oversalt a little than to undersalt, seasoning is key)
a couple shakes of pepper
2 teaspoons of grated ginger (keep your ginger frozen and it grates like parmesan reggiano)
1 ripe mango cubed (There a few ways to cut these, watch some videos on youtube or some shit)
1 A whole lotta love

Mix the avo, garlic, salt, pepper, ginger and mash the fuck out of it with a fork. Taste the shit constantly as you add more salt and pepper, once you jizz in your pants you know you have the right amount of salt. Once you're happy with the consistency of your guac just add that mango and lovingly fold it in.

My Salsa (Also known as chronic ass salsa)

1 Red Onion finely chopped
4 Italian tomatos chopped
Handful of cilantro/coriander minced to fuck
Juice of 1 large lime
Juice of half an orange
hot peppers

Another easy ass but delicious recipe, just add all that shit together and salt until it's chronic, salsa takes more salt than you'd think; be generous, use sea salt, be loving and sprinkle it over with your fingers. The type and amount of hot peppers you decide to use depends on your love for spice. If you're a complete pussy use a bell pepper or some dumb shit. If you're sexy as fuck, use habanero, mince that shit finely.

On cooking roasts:

I cooked a mean ass pork roast the other week in LA. I've never done pork roast but this seemed like a logical way to do it:
Covered animal meat with olive oil, minced garlic (also cut some slits where I jammed crushed cloves in that puppy), rosemary, salt, pepper. With the amounts; just do as much as you think looks tasty. Sear it in a pan on high high heat, each side should be brown and crispy. Turn on the grill on one side. Put that animal on the opposite side of the grill. Go swim and get drunk off tequila for a couple hours. Check up on that bitch, if the juice is clear; dig in.

This recipe is flexible, you don't need to use pork, you don't need to use rosemary. It's just showing that with simple, tasty ingredients and the right method you don't need to do a lot of work. Searing meat and then cooking on a low heat is a guaranteed way to obtain amazing texture, moisture and flavour. Cooking is easy, don't be a dummy.

On cooking vegetables:
Olive oil, salt, pepper, fire. Bell peppers, don't even cut them, just chuck em on. Red onions halved or quartered, chuck em on. Eggplant.
Fuck it.
If you're cooking them in a pan, use butter and balsamic vinegar once it's going hot, that shit's delicious.

Just remember to love every step of the way, that is the legit way to make mean ass comida.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Fresh Mangoz

So the other day we jumped a ditch and picked some fresh mangos from a tree. The difference between those and store-bought is huge! Like a new fruit, prime for mango guac. Or as they called it here guacamole canadience! Probably the bombest way to fill your gut ever invented.
I watched the movie "Precious" today.
Probably one of the darker comedies I've seen, I was actually surprised how well it did considering the dark sense of humor usually found in cult classics. Martin Lawrence did an amazing job though and I was really impressed by the special effects.

After the boat trip I was red as a lobster and just as I got off the boat I asked the first dude I see "Hey do you know where to find some aloe vera?" and he did, it took him like 2 minutes, it had some red ribbons on it so I paid him $10.
I'm really glad I got that aloe vera because I decided to sunbathe in the nude at the beachfront. I think this is the worse burn I've ever had, but for some reason my dick didn't get burned at all. I've learned that the penis is very resistant to sun, I'm guessing that as caveman one of our primary purposes on a daily basis was to reproduce and a hindrance like sunburndick could greatly hinder this process. So my thighs and hip area are beet-red and scabbing now but the aloe' is helping loads. Also the cleaning lady came into the room as I was lying in bed with a fan blowing on my nude midsection. I was also given a lot of weed for free.

So my days have consisted of just chilling by the beach, smoking joints, watching epic lightning storms (apparently this place gets some of the best in the world) and eating good food.

Pretty glad I quit my landscaping job right now.

Apparently there's also a ghost in this house.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Get the fuck up, this boat is real.

If you are not part of right now, you should re-evaluate the way you've been living. The website is basically like facebook except the people on it either have their couches available for "surfers" or are "surfing" themselves. There's no payment, just people doing good deeds for others. I've met some of the coolest people I've ever known in my life through couchsurfing and it's basically a guarantee that they'll be empathetic, cool, sociable, trust-worthy just because of the fact that they open themselves up to strangers. I've noticed the type of people who are involved in couchsurfing are very similar to the ones involved in picking up hitch hikers and being good in general.
I totally neglected couchsurfing for the first segment of this trip and I'm very happy that I remembered it. Mexico was cool when I was on my own but it definitely got frustrating not being able to communicate with anyone and not really making any solid friends. Couchsurfing makes traveling so easy because you're immediately introduced to all the local secrets and tricks to manage in a new environment, not just tour-guide bullshit but cool stuff like good bars, where to get drugs, secret beaches etc.

Yesterday was spent on a sailboat in the Mexican pacific, completely awesome day, basically what you'd expect from a day on a boat. Flips and shit off the boat, swimming, chilling on deck, booze, weed, good music, good people. I'm still blown away by how many awesome people I've been meeting on a daily basis.
Today I went surfing for the first time in ages, I think I'm hooked now, definitely going to try to find a surf town in Nicaragua or Panama or El Salvador or something and just get a board.

I've been making mango guacamole for pretty much everyone who has let me live with them so far. It's blowing minds.

Friday, July 8, 2011

La Cruz

So I didn't end up meeting up with Marco's friend, but I found some cool dude running a little burger stand who sold me some really bad weed, well not too bad but you have to dome a J if you want to get high. But it was $3 for a 1/4 so I can't complain. So I roamed the quiet streets of Mazatlan and got high off of Mexican weed. I saw a man with his face painted as a clown engaged in a serious conversation with a girl, I've never seen a clown look so somber, I couldn't help but laugh. The next day I had a course planned out on how I was going to get to La Cruz and everything worked perfectly and I no longer fear death for I have experienced far worse than anything possible; Big Momma's house en Espanol. No one should be subjected to such a heinous form of torture. After a couple smooth tranfers I ended up in a town called Bucerias and used some dude's cell phone. People have been so helpful in Mexico, whenever I ask for help they really always try their best to understand what I'm trying to convey in my broken spanish and if they do succeed in helping me they let me know how appreciative they are to have the chance to help me out, this is how it should be!
So I got picked up by my new awesome amiga, Abi and we cruised to hit the clubs in Puerto Vallarta for her cousin's 22nd Birthday. The clubs were pretty much like clubs everywhere, loud, bad music, drunk people and the rest of the nonsense. It was fun though, I danced like a madman just for the hell of it then spent the day today lazing by the pool, playing in the surf with Abi's dog and eating fruit. Abi's house is literally located right on the beach, it's really gorgeous here. I'm missing all my friends back home but meeting new ones on the road is just as fun!
Remember, helping others feels just as good, if not better than receiving help from others, it's just a really awesome cycle of positivity. Doing things like hitch-hiking, couchsurfing and just traveling in general really makes it obvious.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

More Mexican Confusion!

So today I hit up to try and find some people to meet up with in Puerto Vallarta. Luckily an awesome girl named Abi messaged me back almost immediately with a place to stay in a town just north of Puerto Vallarta. So with my limited Spanish I set off to try and find a small fishing town called La Cruz. After getting about 5 random people together to try and understand what I was trying to say they finally settled on me catching a bus to a larger bus stop and taking one of the AC busses from there. It was the wrong station, after much more confusing broken-conversation I was directed to another bus stop. When I got there I was told the bus to La Cruz was leaving immediately so I just paid the 6 bucks and got on. I was kind of confused by the price and by the fact that they had a bus running to such a small town. Turns out there are multiple La Cruz´s in Mexico and I was headed back North. Not such a bad thing, chilled out in a park for a bit during siesta, watched a funeral procession and ate some bomb Guacamole, back in Mazatlan for the night and I think my awesome hombre Marco (from CS, stayed with him in Calgary) has hooked me up with a place to stay, just waiting for her to call me back. On the bright side, the sun is doing that thing where as it sets it shoots rays of light through the clouds, over the ocean and some distance islands mountains. Life is truly a gift, dont forget it yo!

No se.

I am currently writing from a small convenience store in a town called Mazatlan. I´ve never heard of this place before, I ended up here because I was at a bus terminal (read: small shop with random dude and his son) and the name sounded cool so I forked over $60 USD, and was thrown on a 15 hour AC bus ride, they didnt even give me a ticket haha. Mexico is definitely a bit of a culture shock, I thought I could get by using basic broken English like I usually do in Asia but for some reason the vast majority of Mexicans I´ve spoken with speak no English whatsoever, my pathetic knowledge of Espanol (ty ms. Blacklaws) definitely surpasses the English vocabulary of most all Mexicans I´ve met.

I hitch hiked down to LA from San Luis Obispo with a really cool dude named Alex, we talked about all sorts of things from Family, America´s fast-food and meth-addictions to values to the actuality of our reality. Hitch hiking is really cool because I can just totally open up to these strangers and talk whatever´s on my mind with no worry of future embarrassment or possible judgements, because I will most likely never meet these people again. On the ride down a cop pulled us over for speeding (80mph in a 65) apparently in California highway patrol really cracks down because the state is near broke and they just want to pull in as much cash as possible. I chatted with the cop for a bit just like he was a normal dude, no sucking up or bitterness. I told Alex he´d give us a warning, Alex was doubtful because he´d never heard of anyone getting a warning for speeding ¨there´s too much money in speeding tickets¨. I still had high hopes though. The cop came back and told Alex he´d be getting off with a warning today. Afterwards Alex jokingly said to me ¨these are not the droids you´re looking for¨

After a train ride and a long bus I ended up in the general area my friend Sean, whom I met in Australia and traveled SE asia with, lived. I realized the address I had written down in my notebook was not an address at all, just a ZIP code but I knew his place was an apartment building and that it was across from a school. I asked a random lady if she recognized my vague description of his home. After some thought she realized that there were some apartments across from a Jr. High nearby. She seemed really worried about me and gave me a ride there, it would have been only like a 10 minute walk but I guess it`s cool to see people who care.

Kicked it with Sean for a few days, went on a badass hike, attended a couple bomb-ass barbeques and partied for a night in Huntington Beach, the patriotism during 4th of July weekend was really funny to me. Also tried some slacklining at Sean´s buddy Rob´s house. It´s really hard, I managed to do a backflip off it.

Grabbed a train down to San Diego then took the trolley to the border. Going into Mexico is a joke, all there is for security is a one-way revolving, metal gate. Tijuana was chaos, tons of cheap awesome places to eat and horrendous traffic. I grabbed a taco and hopped on a bus to the camionera central. Grabbed a 12 hour overnight bus to a town called Hermosillo and tried hitch hiking out of there. I had a feeling that it wasn´t going to happen and decided to grab the random bus to Mazatlan, glad I did because it seemed like there was absolutely nothing between Hermosillo and Mazatlan, that could have been a long and painful hitch-hike voyage. Right now I´m trying to find a chill traveler-oriented beach town on the southwest coast of Mexico, if anyone has any suggestions feel free to share.

Oh yeah, and people kept warning me to be careful in Mexico, contrary to all the bullshit warnings I´ve met nothing but helpful, patient and kind people here. Fuck yo fear, live with Love.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011


Dear brotherhood, I am writing you now from a cool little ranch with chickens and stuff somewhere in Centralish coastal California. I've been gone for one week and it's been amazing so far.

My dad hooked me up with a ride across the border into Northern Washington, the border guard was chill and we got through in under a minute. Hitch hiking in the state of Washington is illegal but honey badger don't give a shit. After a while waiting in the hot sun, catching a short ride and walking down the highway I got a ride from an awesome guy named Johnny and his dog Ginger, the dog had one eye and was licking me the whole ride. Really cool guy who has done lots of traveling himself, he drove me all the way into Seattle where I tried to hitch out of for around 4 hours. A lot of people seemed supportive of my decision to be hitch hiking but they never really followed through by picking me up, this is a very common theme in the hitch hike game, scared losers that are stoked to see you out there but are too ensnared by fear to pick you up. When you see a hitch hiker on the side of the road it seems like just another cool part of the scenery but the reality is that is a human being like you, me or your mom who has been on the side of the road, possibly dehydrated, possibly for 8+ hours and they desperately want someone to pull over, anyone, YOU!

Anyways after my long wait in Seattle, just around sunset a subaru pulled over and I got in to meet an awesome dude named Andrew. We basically talked non-stop the entire way to Portland about all kinds of things; human behavior, conspiracy theories, Phish, psychic abilities, weed, meth problems etc. He had a case of micro-brewery beer and I had a couple, he was already drunk apparently but showed extreme control behind the wheel so I wasn't worried. He let me crash at a friend's place, we all got completely blitzed and watched Uncle Buck, it was on an HD tv so it looked like some crummy soap opera, I was reminded of a dude that's been dubbed "John Candy". The next day I ate a greasy Alabama-style breakfast, eggs, bacon, sausage, gritz, biscuitz, all fried in bacon lard. I started hitching late that day, around 1pm, and didn't make it very far, had a few uninteresting rides, and tried hitching a ride until around midnight when I said fuck it and set up my hammock on the side of the road near a casino.
The next day I washed up in a gas station bathroom and hit the road again. I believe this day was probably one of the worst in terms of receiving rides, I didn't get very far at all, maybe a total of 1.5 hours of distance traveled and many, many hours of waiting. Ended up sleeping in a field on the side of the road, I awoke at around 3am to see an amazingly clear and full starry sky, it was worth it.
I got a couple more rides the next day and ended up in Ashland where I was picked up by a mother and son named Xochi and Kerris. Two amazing people who are totally on the same wavelength as me, we talked extensively about health, spirituality and psychedelic drugs (or as Xochi calls them, medicines). She agreed to drive up to Mt. Shasta with me, we picked up another hitch hiker on the way, his name was Harry and he was just cruising around America, cool dude.
Mt. Shasta was an awesome time, I went for a swim in the freezing cold lake, really refreshing, it was nice playing in the snow as well. After spending the day there with Xochi and Kerris I hit the road again. I ended up getting a ride from some people that looked like absolute in-bred rednecks, but it turned out that they were actually quite well-informed about the going-ons in the world and we had some really interesting discussions. They suggested I get off of the I-5 (mainland hwy) and hit the coast. So I camped out in some trees that night, took a poop in the bush and wiped with an old newspaper. I caught a ride out of Redding in about 10 minutes of waiting by an old couple and without even asking my name the dude just passed a packed pipe to me and I smoked. I forgot to mention that the whole trip weed has been seeming to find me, people who pick up hitch hikers are always more than happy to share some of the good herbs.
They couple took me down the road a little bit where I got picked up by another old redneck couple and their baby. These people already had 6 grandchildren and just had another baby of their own. They were amazingly sweet and caring and the husband was drinking beers. Drinking and driving in America seems to be somewhat prevalent.

I caught another ride through some twisty mountain pass and ended up in a small place called Junction City, the population was probably 30. I saw a burger stand and had been eating so healthy for the past few days I thought I'd get a burger, seeing as I was in America and all. I think it would have been tasty but my body just wanted nothing to do with the thing and I ended up feeling awful for the rest of the day, I think I'm a vegetarian now.

I caught a ride out of there from a really awesome old dude with a sweet white mustache, it reminded me of one of those old British big-game hunters in Africa. He had a ton of amazing travel stories, he lived down on the baja of Mexico and helped sea turtles make it to the ocean, he was retired and living the good life, just cruising around visiting friends and enjoying life. He was also a fan of the good herb.

At my next spot there was an older homeless dude with a sign asking for change or food, he offered me a bunch of food but I only accepted the banana because the rest was crap like sandwiches on white bread and ramen noodles, he didn't want any of it either. The ride I caught was with an awesome white-water kayaker named John, he kicked me down some home-grown bubble gum kush, which is quite excellent.

After getting hassled by some neurotic childish police officer, who had no confidence or control over himself, I caught a ride with a very clean-cut looking older dude. When I first got in I expected it to be one of those quiet rides where we just comment on the weather or scenery. It started out that way but the conversation evolved rapidly, it turns out he's been growing weed in the hills of Northern California for the majority of his life, he was one of the first to start pioneering the whole thing. He's also been at war with the government, special forces and national guard the whole time. He said they've been basically sparring, always tricking the guys but by the sounds of it the government is incredibly sinister. He's convinced that they were dropping tick-infected blankets from helicopters into the forests of the area. These ticks were carriers of a man-altered strain of lime disease that made many families in the area sick, dead or worse. His wife caught the disease and it ate away at her brain to such a degree that she is no longer the wonderful woman she once was, she's an evil shell of a human apparently and Ed didn't even consider her his wife anymore, as far as he's concerned his wife is dead. Just because they decided to take an alternative career path and grow a natural plant that has never done harm to anyone.

On a lighter note, the next dude to pick me up was an amazingly awesome dude named John who was coming back from spending a couple days on the river and was headed to the Kate Wolf music festival. We smoked some weed and had amazing talks, I felt like I was brothers with the guy right from the get-go. He smuggled me into the music festival where I used a fake rubber wrist-band to get past check-points. The festival wasn't really my scene but I met a couple awesome people and enjoyed hanging out with John and his friends. His friend Tim described to me an amazing Ayhuasca experience he had in the jungles of Brazil. I left the next day after saying my farewells.

I caught a couple great rides that day and ended up meeting with these 2 traveler kids who were doing the same thing as me. I asked them what they were up to and they said they were waiting for a girl to pick them up and drive them to a showing of DMT: The Spirit Molecule in San Francisco, seeing as I'm a huge proponent of both the movie and the medicine I decided I'd join them, plus a ride is a huge bonus. We didn't actually get into the screening because we didn't want to pay $12 but I ended up hanging out with them in San Fran, we set up camp (read: sleeping bags on grass) in a park, smoked some weed and made a couple clouds disappear with our minds, good times I suggest you try it.

The next day we stuck together for a bit, had some interesting discussions about citrus, T.H.E.Y, and Life. I split up with them because I felt the need to get back on my own path and caught a ride with a cool older guy named Mike. He told me all sorts of life adventures he's had about living in Japan and tons of other stuff. After many hours baking in the sun and waiting at different on-ramps I decided to start walking down the highway. It is illegal to hitch hike on the highway in California, but honey badger don't give a shit. Sure enough within a couple minutes another little piggy rolled up. He was freaking out and clearly had no control over his life. It felt like dealing with a small neurotic dog, you just have to remain really relaxed and eventually they'll follow your frame. He had me up against the hood and searched me down etc. In the end after a few Jedi Mind Tricks he just ended up giving me a ride down the road to the next good hitching spot, he never searched my bag and never found my weed :)

From there I caught a short ride with a cool dude named Joey, he was really fat, but nice none the less. I got dropped off at a fruit stand where I ate 2 avocados and 2 mangos. I was high so I wanted more mango, and started chatting up a girl in the fruitstand line, she agreed to drive me south a ways and after some great conversation she decided that she would show me a really cool hiking trail where I could camp out. The trail winds through a beautiful valley, as you first enter the hillside is shrouded with cacti and around the next bend it explodes into endless wild-flowers of all colors and types. As the trail progresses you cross a little creek and enter a red-wood forest, beautiful, wise, ancient, giant sky-scrapers all around you, really mystical feeling. I found a clearing in the redwoods where I set up camp that night. It was so clear I could see the milky smeared across the sky and I found if I just space out and look at the sky without looking at a particular spot the stars all started dancing in a really cool choreographed way, this provided much entertainment for me. I also saw a few owl shadows swooping over me which was very cool.

After an amazingly energizing sleep I awoke to a hiker walking past, we greeted eachother and discussed the powerful energies running through the valley, he told me it was definitely some ancient Indian ceremony grounds. I found a cool looking lizard that had a ticked stuck in its head, I pulled the tick out and let the guy go, he hung around for a bit and then scampered off. The early morning mist hung in the valley and really made me feel like I was in Middleearth or something. After hiking down I checked out the ocean for a bit and then caught a ride with a really cool guy named Mark. He was in no rush and I was in no rush so we spent the day driving down the 1 and checking out a bunch of cool beaches and places, he was originally from Vancouver as well so we had a lot in common right off the bat. Incredibly smart and open-minded dude, I stayed the night with him and all the people living on his awesome ranch-type place (which I'm staying at right now) I cooked dinner for the crew, vegan burritos with mango-guacamole. They all loved it so much, there are few things in this life that make me happier than putting all my love into a meal that brings people together and just watching them enjoy my creation to the fullest. It's a great feeling.

A big part of this trip that I never really went into detail with has been the alone time I've been spending every day. The majority of my day is spent waiting for rides or camping out alone, and it's these times that have been the most profound to me. I've been doing a lot of deep searching and have really grown spiritually in just the last few days. A situation is really only what you decide it to be, there is no difference between the time I'm freezing cold, waiting for a ride for 7 hours in the same spot, or cruising down the road with good tunes playing, smoking herbs. It really just depends on the attachment you decide to give the moment. Once you begin to completely let go of everything, even desires or aversions, that's when the true happiness of Being begins to shine.

I hope to inspire many of you to ditch what you think is necessary in your life and embrace the art of Living. Also read the last post I made, I think it's relevant to this whole thing.

Much love to everyone.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Some creative writing.

Nobody knows what's good or bad or right or wrong, they just have been told by others "the way things should be" and those others were told by others before them, life is like a really long and fucked up game of "telephone". Most pepople don't even ask what life even is, they just cruise through it, sprinting for death. There is no reason to be worried or upset about anything, it is our choice to be objective and question everything you are faced with, question it from angles. Defining your own code to live by is one of the most important things a man can do in his lifetime, there is no logical reason to live the exact way that has been shown to us over the years, without stopping to ask "why?" or "how?" Learning to let go of everything and let life live through you instead of constantly trying to desperately steer the ship on your own. Just watch the ride play out and enjoy every tiny step of the way.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

April Fools Day

Sup Bros. ?
I just thought I'd fill you in on some pranks I pulled on April Fools day.

1) Friday morning I woke up real early and sprinkled some ground up pepper on the floor of the upstairs and downstairs bathroom. Then I put some smooth peanut butter in a Ziploc bag and poked a hole at the end of it. I put peanut butter on every handle I could think of, the coffee maker, kettle, sink faucet, fridge door, front door (inside and outside) and my dad's car door handle. I also put some Cheerios in my parents shoes. Later that day I found out that they didn't fall for the Cheerios in the shoes prank but fell victim to all my other booby traps. My cousin also fell for the pepper on the floor in the downstairs bathroom and got a handful of peanut butter when he opened the bathroom door. All in all my mission was successful.

2) I text messaged my sister's boyfriend and told him my sister was in trouble. Pretty lame prank I admit and he didn't fall for it but his reaction was still funny. I also texted my sister and told her that her boyfrend's dog was sick and she needed to get over to his house immediately. She didn't fall for that one and tried to prank me by saying that she lost a movie I lent her.

3) I started texting some friends, told one friend that another friend was moving to Alberta and he believed me. I texted Brother Naresh that a concert we were planning on attending got cancelled, he too believed me.

4) In the afternoon I started thinking of some pranks that were a bit more extreme to try. I texted my friend Matt and told him I could not go to the gym with him that evening because I got in a car accident on the way to school and my neck really hurt. He called me later during the day, and I pretended that I was hurt for a little bit before saying, "April Fools".

5) My last prank of the day was one that I feel bad about now but at the time it seemed like it would be funny. I texted another friend and told him that I had been diagnosed with testicular cancer the night before and I couldn't sleep at all. He called me later, and when I answered the phone I pretended to be really sad. I couldn't keep my bogus story going for more than a minute until I told him it was an April Fools Day joke. He then told me that he was legitimately concerned for the past hour but couldn't call me right away. I decided to end my day of pranks and knee-slappers right then and there.

It would be nice to here what other brothers from different mothers did on April Fools Day, so post some pranks up if you can.

Wishing you all a peaceful and fulfilling journey,
Brother Jason

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Gentle Reminder:

We are all tiny pieces in an entirely pointless and unimaginably complex game in which God experiences itself through endless subjective perspectives. This life as you know it is a mere blink on the infinite time loop of the universe, linear time and your own existence are mere illusions.

Monday, March 14, 2011

These are my twisted words.

From Spiritual Moe, "I want a good heart" Carson, Minivan Oliver, Cynical Mitch, Lisa's Boyfriend, I have nothing on jason, to Anorexic Paul (And the rest of you)

Life has been quite tedious the last couple of months. I've been super busy with school as per usual, and I've decided to live in Victoria for the summer. It goes without saying that I expect to see each and every one of you as many times as humanly possible. Very Homo. Nothing much has changed from the last time we all met face to face. I've been doing everything that's part of my daily routine which includes using steroids 6 times a day, helping the elderly cross the street, Crying at my bedside while listening to Vanessa Carlton's "walk a thousand miles" (for those of you who haven't heard this godsend song... .....that's the link; Make sure you have a box of tissue on hand, tears will definitely be streaming down your face, Eating all the meat that vegetarians like Lisa's boyfriend forgets to eat, ridding the world of dirty hipsters like Mark Edwards and doing homework.

Now daily routine aside, I've actually had a lot of fun. Been hanging with friends whenever I can fit them in my schedule, which to say the least occurs in abrupt patterns. Done my fair share of clubbing which is awesome because I pay for the whole cab there and back everytime, even when it's full!! Except this one time where gaby paid for the entire cab (what a Bitch), and it ruined my night. I really need to find a job soon though or else I won't be able to pay for peoples cab rides home, oh and my rent.

Can't wait to hear the stories from you guys about st.patricks day this thursday. As for me I plan on going to a bar till midnight then seeing Chris Lake a DJ around midnight or so..... But I'll let y'all know what happens.

I love you all from the deepest regions of my heart, and my cock. Mainly my cock though.

Brother Naresh.

I Can't believe I spent 8 bucks to get into a country bar


The Bourbon is a country bar, do not go there assuming otherwise. You will lose some self respect.

Since the blog has died down due to noone wanting to hear about me procrastinating studying and dealing with women looking for local blacktion, carson asking us to make a cult, naresh abusing roids, paul contracting getting worms from going ass to mouth with african girls, Lisa's boyfriend dating Lisa, Moumin getting his heart broken by girls he has never even spoken to and Oliver doing his squats...Wait, I would love to hear about these things.

I love all of you,

Brother Mitch

Saturday, March 5, 2011

No Shame March...It's a thing

No Shame March is well underway right now. If you haven't already join the facebook event and have an excuse for everything you do.!/event.php?eid=191392057567837

Friday, January 21, 2011


Roosters in South East Asia are fucking rampant and they're assholes. The stock image of the noble rooster crowing at the break of dawn and letting the world know it's time to get up and moving is utter bullshit, these fucking dickheads just stay up all night weakly crowing like they have no goddamn pride or something, they just do it to annoy everyone. I was kept awake countless times and eventually built up a hatred for them.
I was talking with some local dude in norther Bali about how shitty roosters are and he asked me if I wanted to see them kill each other, I answered immediately "Yes." No-brainer. I hopped on the back of his moped and we drove into the jungle a ways on some trail, I was starting to think that I was going to be taken to some gang-house to be jacked up. After scoping out a couple "arenas" (read: dirt clearings) we went back to the dude's family's place because he found out the cock fights were going to be in the evening. So I sat around with some Balinese dudes, some old, some young, we were drumming and drinking palm liquor straight, it was a good ol' fashion afternoon in Bali.
We biked up deep into the jungle a long some really narrow windy, bumpy path until we we reached a large dirt clearing in the middle of the jungle. The atmosphere was surreal, caged roosters everywhere, people holding roosters by their legs, roosters in bags, men and children as young as 4 years old all just hanging around and chilling out.
What they do to find a match is they hold to roosters face to face to see if they'll actually fight, if one pussies out before the match even happens then they don't even bother setting it up. When they finally find a pair that are down to rumble they strap on razor sharp knives to the rooster's feet, so the roosters think they are just scrapping as usual but they're actually stabbing eachother to death.
I saw one really badass rooster and told my buddy that we'd bet on him but every other rooster was too afraid to fight the guy and he never had a match. I bet $5 on another match and my buddy bought the loser for dinner. Watch the chickens fight was really intense, at first they were kind of just jumping at eachother but then one of them realized it'd been stabbed and started limping away and then finally just collapsed in a pile of feathers. If the loser doesn't die they take the knife and stab it in its heart.
After the fights were done my friend (never even got the dude's name) and I left with the dead rooster and the one who won (to train for future fighting), I drove this time and he was on the back with a rooster bag in each hand. It was a fun ass ride down the mountain and I caught air going over some bump and nearly made the dude fly off, hilarious. After we got back the grandma cut up the dead rooster and made some of the spiciest chicken stew ever, I'm pretty good with spices but my entire face was sweating and snot was running out my nose like crazy. Good shit though.

Sunday, January 16, 2011


I have decided to describe some of the types of people who have picked me up while hitch-hiking, for those of you who haven't hitched before to get a better understanding of the types that are willing to let a strange man into their car for no compensation*. These are all real people who have picked me up in the past, I'll try to keep them in chronological order.

1. A middle-aged man with a crying baby in the backseat. I realized I had left my wallet with the friend who dropped me off at my hitch-hike point, since I fell asleep on the way to the hitch hike point I had no idea what direction to go in, all I had was a vague description of a beach near the house. It was also confusing because he drove about 20 minutes to a point he thought would be good and then changed his mind, drove back and dropped me off at an alternative spot. After driving around for ~1 hr describing the beach to dozens of people we finally found the location. It was a 2 minute drive from where the man had picked me up. He wasn't angry at all because his baby fell asleep during the car ride and I got my wallet back, nothing really outstanding about this guy, just very patient and altruistic.

2. An old man of around 75 years old in a beat up old car only headed 10km down the road, dropped me off at a bus stop. Trusting and kind for his age.

3. A young man of ~25 who offered me a ride and $50 if I allowed him to suck MY dick. I was confused and had to have him repeat his offer several times, because I always thought it was the other way around, I declined his offer out of pure homophobia, looking back I think that was one of the most generous offers I've ever been handed in my life.

4. Surfing guy, covered in zinc for sun protection, nice fellow.

5. Older, squat fellow with a bald head and unsightly teeth, he had a camper van that he was sleeping out of and traveling Australia with. I slept for most of the car ride and when we awoke in the town of Bega he asked "Wanna sleep with us tonight?" in his fast, aussie accent. I had no idea who "us" was or where they were located, I said "yes" before I could think about it. After answering him I started going over all the ways this man was most likely going to kill me and what he would do with me before-hand, I really started getting nervous once we got off the main road and started heading for about 20 minutes down a dirt path.
We pulled up to a small bungalow and went around back, there was a couple grilling meat with some kids running around, I was offered a beer. "Us" referred to himself, his brother and his brother's family. I got a free meal, beer and watched Year 1 with the kids, slept in the camper on my own and left the next morning.

6. Religious man and his daughter. He was some form of pastor who talked a lot, really nice guy but kept pushing his beliefs on me. His daughter had the Australian equivalent of an L, which I believe was a P or something and he had her driving, I was really quite afraid because she was a horrible driver and the dad kept distracting to her to back up his claims. Some of the things he told me were that it was God's will that the allies won World War II, and he gave me a bunch of proof (which I have yet to check if it was accurate) involving weather and other such nonsense that favored the allies. Another thing he told me, which is kind of strange considering recent events, was that Australia had been going through a 10 year drought (started in 2000) but it would end at the end of 2011 and Australia would get record rainfalls. This claim had nothing to do with God but he said that a trust-worthy geologist predicted it, guess he was right. Anyway he invited me to join them for a sermon or some nonsense, I quickly refused and thanked him for the ride.

7. An elderly couple heading for their vacation home, very nice, no real interesting story here.

8. A young man driving 2 of his female friends home from some form of event, I was offered a place to crash by one of the friend's, I stayed at her place for 3 nights and got tons of free food and beer, one of the nicest people I've ever met, showed me koalas and fairy penguins as well.

9. A truck driver who told me most "truckees" don't pick up hitch hikers because they're scared the hitch hikers will want to sleep in the small cot behind the seats. He offered me a house to stay in in Melbourne but I already had a place to go to.

10. A very nice gay man gave me a ride from Aldergrove to Kelowna after asking if I was sane. He installed car sunroofs and condoned steroid use, he thought working out was a waste of time if not aided by steroids, nice guy.

11. A polish immigrant gave me a ride back from Kelowna and told me how he literally had to flee his country, like jump fences and escape in the night and then spend a year in a camp in Italy before being allowed into Canada. Came into the country with nothing but now owns a successful furniture building company, good example of coming from nothing and creating success.

12. An elderly English gentleman in a Jaguar gave me a ride from Aldergrove to Kelowna, probably the nicest car I've hitched in. He owned a radio station and a TV station and a bunch of other stuff, real entrepreneur, also built himself up from nothing. He had some good stories, he worked as a radio DJ in Winnepeg and would request blondes meet him behind the building after the show, on-air, he said it never failed. He also told a story of crashing into 2 separate police cars, in 2 separate incidences in one night. Classic.

13. A Christian family in their RV. They had 7 kids. I got to sit in the captain seat, they fed me roast beef sandwiches and we listened to sermons on the tape-deck. I also checked out some spiralling tunnels up near Banff with them, I totally felt like part of the family, really nice people.

14. A young hippie girl with dreadlocks, she drove a VW beatle and had awful BO. She told me to WOOF (volunteer work/farming in exchange for food and a place to stay). She was very trusting though, it's somewhat rare for a single girl to pick up a hitch hiker, I guess it's dangerous.

15. A native man named Marlen. He told me he was a compulsive gambler, lost his family due to drinking/drug problems, kicked all of his habits except gambling. He stayed up all night before in a casino and on the way up to Edmonton, from Calgary, he was trying to persuade me to join him in Red Deer for a night of gambling, I didn't want to stay in Red Deer so I convinced him that the right thing to do was to drive straight through to Edmonton. He told me that he had seen a double rainbow recently (this was days after the popular youtube of a similar title was released) I asked him if it was amazing and he confessed that it was.

16. A woman with a broken wrist picked me up outside of Edmonton. She took me to what appeared to be a perfect hitch hike spot. 2 Gas Stations and 2 Truck stops, you can hit up people filling their vehicles and ask truckers. People looked at me like I wanted to kill them and then a gas station attendee told me that I was soliciting on private property and told me he would call the police if I don't leave (I think he did call the police because they showed up not long after). In reality my approach was this:
Walk up to person with a big smile.
Ask "Hey how's it going? mind if I ask which direction your headed?" (I asked the direction because if I ask "hey are you going east?" they always said "no" 100%, without fail, they would deny it)
If they said East I would just kindly ask if I could join them, when they declined I just smiled and said "no problem have a nice day!"
Apparently this type of behavior is totally unacceptable in our society and requires the intervention of police units, thank god for those guys!
That day I waited 9 hours for a ride, asked countless truck drivers and people for rides and tried sitting on the road with a sign. I gave up and a city-surveyor who saw the whole deal gave me a ride back to Edmonton. Caught a ride to Calgary with a new found friend the next day.

17. A younger physics teacher from Medicine Hat. While walking down the highway headed East out of Calgary I got a ticket from some police officers for having my thumb out, it was for $25. I tore it up. I then walked for around 2 or 3 hours, basically until Calgary was out of site. That's when I got picked up by the physics teacher, we discussed travel, had a very similar taste in music and he even talked about some string theory. I realized I'm a moron.

18. I was dropped off at a gas station in Medicine Hat by a construction worker, on the way from where he picked me up to the gas station I counted 3 hitch hikers (in a 10 minute drive), one of them being seated right in front of the gas station. I started asking the people filling their tanks, same old story, people looking at me like I wanted their blood and then the gas station attendant telling me to leave. I talked to the dude sitting on the road for a bit, he was headed to montreal as well, I wish him luck and started walking East, since I was the last to show up I thought it was moral to take the place farthest down the road.
I walked for maybe 45 minutes with my massive "MONTREAL" sign behind my shoulders for drivers to see. I decided to stop for a bit and drink some water (I kept a 4L jug filled with water before I left, very crucial). I then see an old Mazda covered in old fruit swerving from the inside lane up to the shoulder. I ran up to them and asked my usual "hey, where you guys headed?". It was a guy and a girl, both with shoulder length hair, I noticed the fruits on the car were cherries, they were about 20 years old. The guy answered "Montreal". I was pretty much speechless, "Wait, so you guys are going from here, to montreal? And you're willing to take me with you?..."
"uhhh yeah man". Luckiest hitch hiking moment ever.

Anyway to cap it up, the types of people who are trusting enough to pick up a stranger from the side of the road really come from all walks of life, but the one similarity I found is that they're all positive people, always smiling, I think there might be a correlation between people who trust their fellow man and people who are happy. And I'd say the best advice is to never get angry or frustrated, if you don't allow yourself to get into those negative thought-loops nothing can go wrong, even if shit is bad from an outsiders perspective if it isn't affecting you negatively on an internal level it actually isn't bad. At around the 8 hour mark of that day in Edmonton I actually started laughing at how ridiculous it was that people were totally refusing to pick me up, turns out it was for the better, I never would have gotten that ride from Medicine Hat and could have ended up taking weeks to get through Ontario (which is usually the case.)

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Fuck Banana Pancakes, Fuck Jack Johnson And Fuck Jack Johnson's song "Banana Pancakes"

Happy New Year Bros,

I just ate a large pizza and drank some granville island winter ale , now I will write you the tender passages of my soul. I can't remember things chronologically so I will tell them by event.

Meat Fest- Two of my good friends enjoy hunting, then they have a ton of meat they need to eat. We had a dinner to void some of this meat, we called it a meat fest. My other friend who is red seal certified did all the cooking of the meat, which was enough to serve probably 14 people though we were only 5. We made Bear sausage pizzas, antelope burgers, moose roast, and venison chops. Then after I went and got a couple tubs of ice cream, we ate that too.

Downtown gathering in an appartment(not a party)- Brothers Naresh, Jake, Carson, Yazad and Moe attended this gathering as well at a mutual friends place, I remember people being pretty stiff then I got severely hammered danced by myself to some Justin Timberlake(two of the brothers have this on video I believe) and had some conversations where I remember the people but I dont know what we talked about. Then Brothers Carson, Naresh and me took a drunk bus ride to my place.

Pizza and Beer-Tonight I am drinking pizza and eating some beer.

These are the big events in my life lately,

also I turned 21 about a week ago.

Cheers Brothers.